Once upon a time in the hallowed halls of American politics, a group of well-heeled contributors led by beer magnate Joseph Coors decided they could run this country better than the rest of us. In 1973, with a whiskey-soaked vision and a check for $250,000, they birthed the Heritage Foundation. This think tank was destined to become a key player in how this nation’s policies would roll out—like a beer barrel on a bumpy road.

Now, let’s not kid ourselves. You gotta be a bit tipsy to think a handful of rich boys should collectively steer the ship of state. But that’s the American Dream, isn’t it? Achieve success through hard work—or, as Mike Royko would wisecrack, “have the morals of a grave robber.” In this case, call ‘em Vampire Capitalists.

The Heritage Foundation has had its share of successes, particularly during the Reagan years. They crafted the “Mandate for Leadership,” a policy blueprint that was a hit with the Gipper. That document laid out the groundwork for major tax cuts and unleashed the spirit of deregulation. They took over the policy playground, showing the political elite how to bamboozle the masses with broad ideas clothed in fine suits.

And how about our friend Bill Clinton, eh? The Frat Boy White House had a few close dances with Heritage, swaying to the tune that the only way to remain popular was to play ball with these boys. Clinton’s welfare reforms echoed Heritage’s blueprint, showcasing the way the left and right can tango, even when their feet often get tangled.

But here’s the kicker: while a small network of elites calls the shots, most Americans are left standing outside the club, looking in. They’re submerged in the same social circles that dictate who gets invited to the table.

Now, Kevin D. Roberts, the head honcho at Heritage, is ringing the bells of a “Second American Revolution.” He’s claiming this revolution can be “bloodless” if the masses just sit around and let it happen. That’s rich coming from a group that wouldn’t know what a real revolution looked like if it hit them over the head with a beer bottle.

The notion that America should roll over and play dead for a “revolution” orchestrated by a few privileged aristocrats is, quite frankly, beyond all reason. The people deserve a government that listens, not a regime that insists their voices are but whispers in the wind.

So, as we stand on the verge of another round of political posturing, let’s remember: the American Dream thrives not because a few fat cats say it does, but because the working folks who put in the sweat and grit of everyday life refuse to let it slip away. The real revolution starts when we stand up and reclaim the conversation from those who think they can drink us under the table.

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