THE INTERNATIONAL SCANDAL SHEET
Exposing the Outrageous, the Ridiculous, and the Occasionally True Since Whenever
EXCLUSIVE INVESTIGATION — 69TH BIRTHDAY EDITION
Estimated length: 4,000 words | Estimated reading time: 16–20 minutes
By Maxine T. Scandal, Senior Correspondent for Political Misbehavior, Revolutionary Disasters, and Romantic Misadventures
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS — October 28, 2026, 21:00 CDT
NOTORIOUS OCCUPY CHICAGO TROUBLEMAKER TURNS 69! STILL ARGUES WITH EVERYBODY! STILL LIKES WOMEN!
CHICAGO — Somewhere in the Philippines, a former Occupy Chicago activist is celebrating his 69th birthday, and the world has apparently failed to take appropriate precautions, or provide the much deserved recognition as an activist.
His name is Cliff Potts.
He is a writer, political troublemaker, Christian with revolutionary tendencies, self-confessed dirty old man, and, according to certain participants in Occupy Chicago back in 2012, a misogynist.
He is also the frontman, lead performer, producer, director, songwriter, lyricist, programmer, and general mastermind behind the internationally questionable musical “group” Cliff Potts & the AI Rebellion.
A musical enterprise in which Potts apparently decided that having an entire band of actual human beings would only create more opportunities for arguments.
(Unapologetic self-promotion: Cliff Potts & the AI Rebellion — available on your favorite streaming service.)
Our investigators are currently attempting to determine whether the AI Rebellion has unionized, demanded royalties, or filed a formal complaint against its management.
So far, the machines have declined to comment.
Our investigative department has uncovered another shocking development.
Fourteen years after being accused of misogyny, Potts still denies the charge.
Even more scandalously, he admits to liking women.
Beautiful women. Intelligent women. Opinionated women. Women who disagree with him. Women who laugh at his jokes. Even women who tell him his jokes aren’t funny.
Particularly women over 30.
But the accusations surrounding this notorious individual are merely the beginning.
Our investigators have uncovered connections to the Egyptian Revolution, Operation BART, Occupy Wall Street, Occupy Chicago, Students for a Democratic Society, the technology industry, Christianity, and a mysterious political tribunal that allegedly convicted him without bothering to invite him to the proceedings.
And now, at 69, the suspect has launched an international romantic initiative involving a pizza restaurant in the Philippines.
Meanwhile, his websites are attracting an extraordinary volume of traffic apparently originating in China.
The International Scandal Sheet has reopened its files.
The public deserves answers.
SHOCKING REVELATION! THE REVOLUTIONARY USED TO BE A CONSERVATIVE!
Our investigators have uncovered a potentially devastating fact about Cliff Potts.
Between 1994 and 2000, the future Occupy Chicago troublemaker was politically more conservative.
Yes, conservative.
The International Scandal Sheet immediately dispatched its entire investigative department to determine whether this constituted a criminal offense.
Unfortunately, both reporters were on lunch.
But something changed around 2000.
Potts had been working in the technology industry, watching how businesses operated, how workers were treated, and how economic decisions affected ordinary people’s lives.
What he experienced left him increasingly disillusioned.
And what he saw coming out of Washington and Wall Street didn’t improve his opinion.
He concluded that the American political and economic system was failing the people it was supposed to serve.
The promises of prosperity, opportunity, and economic security increasingly seemed disconnected from the experiences of ordinary working Americans.
And Potts, who had never demonstrated an exceptional talent for keeping his opinions to himself, began fighting back.
Not with a rifle.
Not with a revolutionary army.
With information, arguments, writing, and an extraordinary willingness to irritate people who believed they possessed authority.
But there was something else beneath the political anger.
Religion.
Specifically, Christianity.
HOLY SMOKE! THE TROUBLEMAKER WAS FIGHTING IN THE NAME OF JESUS!
Potts had long understood his opposition to injustice through his Christian faith.
The Apostle Paul wrote in Ephesians 6:12 that the struggle was not merely against flesh and blood, but against spiritual powers and forces of evil.
For Potts, that passage described something larger than disagreements with individual politicians or corporate executives.
It described a struggle against the systems, institutions, and moral failures that allow exploitation and injustice to flourish.
He wasn’t necessarily claiming that every politician he disliked was a demon.
Although our investigators suspect he may occasionally have entertained the possibility.
His conviction was that human beings had a responsibility to confront injustice rather than simply accept it.
For years, he had been inclined to fight in the name of Jesus.
Eventually, he simply fought.
Still in the name of Jesus.
Most people just didn’t realize it.
The International Scandal Sheet contacted neither the Vatican nor the Almighty for comment.
Our legal department advised against both.
EGYPT ERUPTS! AN AMERICAN TROUBLEMAKER JOINS THE CONVERSATION!
In January 2011, Egypt erupted in revolution.
Mass demonstrations beginning January 25 challenged President Hosni Mubarak’s government. Protesters gathered in Cairo’s Tahrir Square, and the confrontation eventually forced Mubarak’s resignation on February 11.
Thousands of miles away, Cliff Potts was living in Texas, working from an extended-stay hotel.
He was in his fifties.
He had a computer.
He had an internet connection.
And he was already tired of what he considered the stupidity of powerful institutions.
Potts recalls becoming involved early in the Egyptian uprising, connecting with people on the ground and trying to help them communicate their struggle to the outside world.
He wasn’t in Cairo.
He wasn’t standing in Tahrir Square.
He wasn’t facing Egyptian security forces.
But he believed information mattered, and he wanted to help people fighting for political change get their message heard.
The precise date and extent of his remote participation have not been independently documented.
Nevertheless, the experience became an important chapter in his political life.
He was discovering that a man with a computer could support people confronting powerful institutions thousands of miles away.
Apparently, geographical distance was no longer sufficient to keep Cliff Potts out of trouble.
THE REVOLUTIONARY WITH A FULL-TIME JOB AND NO PERMANENT HOME!
The next chapter was considerably less glamorous.
In May 2011, Potts moved to Chicago, where he sublet a room from a friend.
Later that year, after August, he found himself living in an extended-stay hotel outside Chicago with that same friend and his friend’s son.
All three were technically homeless.
And Potts was working a full-time job.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen.
The man supporting movements against economic inequality was experiencing housing instability himself.
He had employment.
He had a computer.
He had an internet connection.
What he didn’t have was a permanent home.
Welcome to the American Dream, extended-stay edition.
The circumstances offered a particularly sharp illustration of the economic contradictions that would help fuel Occupy.
Employment did not automatically provide housing security.
Working full-time did not necessarily mean financial stability.
And having somewhere to sleep did not mean having a permanent place to call home.
Potts was living those contradictions while simultaneously trying to explain them to other people.
Our investigators have concluded that the arrangement was an unusually efficient method of conducting political research.
Unfortunately, the research subjects were also responsible for paying the hotel bill.
OCCUPY WALL STREET! THE MAN ANSWERS THE CALL!
Potts recalls that in July 2011, someone operating an Occupy Wall Street account asked for assistance spreading the word about the developing movement.
This was before the September 17 occupation of Zuccotti Park in New York City.
The movement was still organizing, recruiting support, and attempting to build momentum.
Potts says he answered the request.
And he made a promise.
He would help get the message out and support the mission.
That promise became central to his understanding of his involvement.
He had not joined a political party.
He had not enlisted in an army.
He had not signed a contract surrendering his independence to a revolutionary committee.
He had agreed to help someone advance a cause he believed in.
And he intended to honor that commitment.
Potts’s recollection of the July exchange has not been independently verified, but the chronology is consistent with Occupy Wall Street’s organizing period.
For Potts, the obligation was personal.
He was there to help the movement.
Not to acquire a new collection of bosses.
OPERATION BART! THE TROUBLEMAKER GOES WEST WITHOUT LEAVING CHICAGO!
By August 2011, Cliff Potts had apparently decided that supporting revolutionaries in Egypt and helping organize Occupy Wall Street weren’t enough excitement for one lifetime.
Now he was helping activists in San Francisco.
From Chicago.
Remotely.
The controversy involved Bay Area Rapid Transit, better known as BART.
Following the fatal police shooting of Charles Hill in July 2011, protesters organized demonstrations challenging police conduct.
In August, BART officials interrupted cellphone service at several underground stations in an effort to interfere with protest coordination.
The decision provoked outrage.
Critics compared the communications shutdown to tactics used by authoritarian governments, including the Egyptian government during the revolution earlier that year.
The Anonymous-associated campaign known as Operation BART emerged in response.
Potts recalls participating remotely in support of the campaign and its protesters.
His recollection does not establish participation in Anonymous’s hacking activities, and none is alleged here.
He wasn’t standing on a San Francisco train platform.
He wasn’t buying a ticket to California.
But once again, the man had found himself involved in a political confrontation thousands of miles from his computer.
First Egypt.
Then Occupy organizing.
Then San Francisco.
Apparently, Cliff Potts believed that if trouble was worth getting into, geographical distance shouldn’t be an obstacle.
And he was only getting started.
THE MAN WHO OCCUPIED THE WORLD FROM BEHIND A KEYBOARD!
When Occupy Wall Street became a worldwide phenomenon in September 2011, Potts was already involved.
He operated under his real name, an unusual choice in a political environment populated by anonymous accounts, revolutionary nicknames, and people who occasionally seemed to possess more Twitter identities than clean socks.
He became known to activists associated with Occupy New York, Chicago, Oakland, Los Angeles, San Diego, and Michigan.
He circulated information, supported demonstrations, defended activists, and involved himself in arguments that any sensible individual would have abandoned after the first fifteen minutes.
His involvement continued through the movement’s decline around 2014.
For several years, the man operated as a one-person communications nuisance from behind a keyboard.
His weapon of choice?
An opinion.
His ammunition?
More opinions.
His greatest tactical weakness?
Not knowing when to shut the hell up.
THE LEADERLESS MOVEMENT WITH PEOPLE WHO WANTED TO GIVE ORDERS!
Occupy was supposed to be different.
No traditional bosses.
No permanent political hierarchy.
No individual claiming the authority to command everybody else.
Decisions were supposed to emerge through the General Assembly and its consensus process.
That was the theory, anyway.
And Potts believed in it.
He believed people participating in Occupy were comrades working toward common goals, not subordinates in somebody else’s private political organization.
He also believed the General Assembly could be influenced by persuasive individuals, especially as the movement grew exhausted and participation declined.
Then came a woman using the online handle Feminist Bully.
According to Potts, she became involved relatively late in the movement and frequently attempted to assert authority over other participants, particularly older men.
He says he was among those who objected.
Not because she was a woman.
Because he did not believe she possessed the authority she appeared to claim.
Potts’s position was straightforward.
He had not agreed to take orders from her.
He had not agreed to take orders from Occupy Chicago.
His involvement originated with the personal commitment he says he made to someone associated with Occupy Wall Street in July 2011.
That commitment was to support the movement’s mission, not to surrender his independence to anyone who decided to become a revolutionary supervisor.
He respected the General Assembly as a mechanism for collective decisions.
But he did not believe that made every participant answerable to every other participant.
In Potts’s understanding, comrades were supposed to cooperate.
They were not supposed to command one another.
Unfortunately, a movement without traditional leaders can still attract people who would very much enjoy being leaders.
And Potts was not especially talented at pretending otherwise.
BREAKING SCANDAL! CONVICTED IN ABSENTIA BY THE PEOPLE’S COURT!
Following the 2012 NATO summit in Chicago, tensions within Occupy Chicago continued.
Potts says his disagreements with Feminist Bully escalated into accusations of misogyny.
Then, according to his account, something extraordinary happened.
A group of participants conducted what he describes as an online People’s Court.
They accused him of misogyny.
They discussed his supposed offense.
And they reached their conclusion.
GUILTY!
There was just one minor procedural complication.
Potts says nobody told him the proceedings were happening.
He was not present.
He was not invited to defend himself.
He did not even know he had been tried.
In legal terminology, the alleged proceeding was conducted in absentia—in the accused person’s absence.
In tabloid terminology, this is known as an exceptionally efficient prosecution.
Why waste time hearing from the defendant when everybody already knows what they think?
Our investigators have not independently obtained records of this proceeding or testimony from the other participants. The account remains Potts’s recollection.
The alleged conviction nevertheless produced an awkward discovery.
At a later protest, according to Potts, a woman approached him and said something remarkable.
She told him she would really like him if he weren’t such a misogynist.
Potts was astonished.
He had apparently acquired a reputation without knowing it.
Our correspondent imagines that the expression on his face was worth the price of admission.
The man had been found guilty of an offense he didn’t know he had been charged with.
Occupy Chicago had apparently invented the revolutionary surprise trial.
SHOWDOWN AT LASALLE AND JACKSON! THE ACCUSED APPEARS!
Eventually, the dispute moved into the streets of Chicago.
But Potts says he did not organize the confrontation.
According to him, Feminist Bully arranged the showdown at LaSalle and Jackson, intending to make her accusations publicly known.
Potts attended.
He says he did not take the accusations particularly seriously, although he certainly took the opportunity to argue.
And argue he did.
He confronted people he believed had already formed opinions about him.
They challenged him.
He challenged them.
Voices rose.
Positions hardened.
And absolutely nobody appears to have discovered the secret of peaceful revolutionary cooperation.
Potts acknowledges that he made an ass of himself during the confrontation.
Our investigative department considers this admission the most compelling evidence in the entire dossier.
The encounter did little to resolve the underlying dispute.
But it demonstrated something important.
Even a movement dedicated to changing the world can find itself consumed by arguments about who gets to tell whom what to do.
THE MYSTERY OF FEMINIST BULLY!
Our investigation now enters murkier territory.
Potts says he became curious about Feminist Bully’s political background.
Who was she?
Where had she come from?
How had she acquired such confidence in issuing instructions to other activists?
He began looking into her publicly available political history.
He recalls finding little online activity preceding the Wisconsin labor protests against Governor Scott Walker’s restrictions on public-sector collective bargaining.
Those protests occurred in 2011 and helped energize a broader generation of American activists.
Potts says his inquiries resulted in accusations that he was attempting to dox her.
He acknowledges that investigating someone’s identity can cross legitimate privacy boundaries, even when the stated purpose is to understand their political background.
He maintains that he was not trying to locate her home or expose private personal information.
He wanted to understand her political history and the source of her claimed authority.
The International Scandal Sheet has not independently verified the allegations surrounding those inquiries.
And no, our investigators will not be publishing anyone’s private address.
Even imaginary tabloids occasionally have standards.
THE SDS CONNECTION! A REVOLUTIONARY COINCIDENCE!
Then came an intriguing possibility.
Potts heard that Feminist Bully had connections to Students for a Democratic Society, or SDS, at Wright Junior College in Chicago.
He could not independently establish the full history of those connections.
But the suggestion caught his attention.
Because decades earlier, Potts himself had maintained close connections with SDS activists at El Centro College in Dallas, Texas.
Two political activists.
Two separate colleges.
Two connections to the SDS tradition.
And one spectacular inability to get along.
Our investigators consider this an extraordinary coincidence.
The revolutionary family tree apparently contained branches that occasionally struck one another over the head.
Potts also recalls hearing that Feminist Bully had received support for her continuing political education.
He expresses no objection to that.
On the contrary, he believes people should pursue education whenever they have the opportunity.
The disagreement was never about whether she deserved an education.
It was about whether she deserved to give him orders.
SHOCKING REVELATION! THE ACCUSED ACTUALLY RESPECTED HIS ACCUSER!
Perhaps the most surprising detail in the dossier concerns an activist training session near a horse statue in Chicago.
Potts attended as an observer.
Feminist Bully was there as well.
And he remembers watching her as information was being presented.
He recalls the intensity of her concentration.
Her attention.
Her apparent determination to absorb and understand what she was being taught.
He found it impressive.
Very impressive.
Potts says he genuinely respected her intellectual seriousness and commitment to learning.
Which raises an inconvenient question.
How does a man who supposedly despised women find himself admiring the intelligence and dedication of a woman with whom he was engaged in a bitter political dispute?
The answer, of course, is that human beings are considerably more complicated than political labels.
Respecting someone’s abilities does not require agreeing with their behavior.
Disagreeing with a woman does not automatically constitute misogyny.
And admiring a woman’s intelligence does not automatically prove that a man has never behaved badly toward women.
Both propositions can be true.
Potts maintains that his disagreement with Feminist Bully concerned authority, independence, and the methods by which Occupy should operate.
Not her sex.
And not her right to participate.
As for why she appeared so determined to shut him down, Potts has occasionally entertained a less conventional explanation.
He wondered whether she might actually have been attracted to him.
Our investigators have found precisely zero evidence supporting this theory.
But they concede that it is entirely consistent with the imagination of a man who would eventually describe himself as a dirty old man.
EXCLUSIVE FAMILY REVELATION! THE SUSPECT WAS RAISED AROUND WOMEN!
Our investigation has uncovered another astonishing fact.
Cliff Potts grew up with his mother and two sisters.
Women were not mysterious creatures who occasionally appeared in his life.
They were part of his everyday existence.
He grew accustomed to their company, their conversations, their disagreements, and their opinions.
He also became comfortable with the idea that women were perfectly capable of making their own decisions.
And telling him when he was wrong.
A privilege that, according to the suspect himself, they exercised regularly.
Potts maintains that he has always preferred the company of women and generally finds conversations with them enjoyable.
He does not believe that every friendship between a man and a woman must involve sexual attraction.
He does not believe that admiring a woman’s beauty prevents a man from respecting her intelligence.
And he does not believe that treating women as equals requires pretending that he never notices an attractive one.
Our investigators have asked whether any of these positions qualify him for sainthood.
The Vatican has reportedly not been contacted.
SHOCKING ADMISSION! HE LIKES YOUNGER WOMEN!
Now comes the confession that may destroy whatever remains of his reputation.
At 69, Cliff Potts admits that he finds younger adult women attractive.
How young?
Thirty and older.
Yes, thirty.
Forty.
Fifty.
And beyond.
The man is apparently unaware that modern society occasionally behaves as though a woman’s attractiveness expires somewhere between her thirtieth birthday and the arrival of her first gray hair.
Potts rejects that proposition entirely.
He has a message for women who believe they’ve become invisible as they’ve grown older.
Ladies, whoever told you that your beauty had an expiration date was wrong.
You haven’t disappeared.
Not in his eyes.
Not even close.
He believes women can become more interesting with age, carrying the experiences, confidence, humor, intelligence, and independence that come from having lived a little.
And yes, he still notices when a woman is beautiful.
He also notices when she’s intelligent, funny, kind, outspoken, or capable of telling him to stop talking nonsense.
Particularly that last one.
There is considerable demand for that particular skill.
BEHIND THE LAUGHTER: THE YEAR THAT NEARLY BROKE THE TROUBLEMAKER
For all the jokes, political arguments, musical misadventures, and outrageous declarations, there is another side to Cliff Potts’s story.
One that isn’t particularly funny.
On September 3, 2025, Potts lost his wife, Luz.
It was a devastating loss, the end of a marriage and a companionship that had become central to his life in the Philippines.
Then, in March 2026, he lost his beloved dog, Princess.
Some people might dismiss the death of a pet as a lesser tragedy.
Potts would not.
A dog becomes part of the household, part of the daily routine, part of the quiet companionship that makes a home feel like a home.
And when that companionship disappears, the silence can be overwhelming.
Then came June 2026.
Potts lost his son.
Three losses in less than a year.
His wife.
His dog.
His son.
There are no clever tabloid headlines capable of making those losses easier to bear.
No political arguments that can reverse them.
No computer program that can bring back the companionship and relationships that have been lost.
The man who had spent years confronting governments, corporations, and political organizations found himself facing something he couldn’t argue into submission.
Grief.
And grief doesn’t care how stubborn a man is.
It doesn’t care how many battles he’s fought or how many times he’s refused to surrender.
It simply arrives, takes what it takes, and leaves the living to figure out what comes next.
Yet Potts continues writing.
He continues making music.
He continues finding things to laugh about, even when laughter doesn’t come easily.
He continues looking for reasons to get up tomorrow.
Not because the losses have stopped hurting.
But because his story isn’t finished.
And perhaps that is the most important thing about the man approaching his 69th birthday.
After everything that has happened, he still wants to live.
He still wants to create.
He still wants to enjoy the company of another human being.
And he still believes there might be a little happiness waiting somewhere down the road.
Even if it begins with something as ordinary as sharing a pizza.
INTERNATIONAL ROMANCE ALERT! NOTORIOUS TROUBLEMAKER SEEKS PIZZA COMPANION!
Our investigation now moves thousands of miles from the streets of Chicago to Baybay City, Leyte, Philippines.
Here, the former Occupy activist has apparently launched the least sophisticated romantic initiative in modern history.
He would like to take a woman out for pizza.
Specifically, a pizza date at Shakey’s in Baybay City.
No elaborate courtship strategy.
No expensive restaurant.
No political loyalty oath.
No ideological purity test.
And absolutely no People’s Court afterward.
Just a pleasant afternoon or evening with a lovely woman who might enjoy sharing a pizza, a few laughs, and some good conversation.
Potts doesn’t particularly care whether she’s wealthy or struggling, politically active or completely uninterested in politics.
He’d simply enjoy meeting a kind, interesting woman who appreciates humor, enjoys conversation, and wouldn’t mind spending a little time with an older gentleman who still believes that getting to know a woman is one of life’s genuine pleasures.
There are no expectations and no pressure.
If a friendship develops, wonderful.
If something more blossoms naturally between two consenting adults, he certainly wouldn’t complain.
But even if the evening ends with nothing more than a shared pizza, a smile, and a pleasant memory, he’d consider it time well spent.
At 69, Cliff Potts isn’t looking for perfection.
He’s hoping to meet someone who enjoys his company as much as he enjoys hers.
And he’d be delighted to buy the pizza.
THE FINAL VERDICT: GUILTY OF BEING CLIFF POTTS
After examining the available evidence, The International Scandal Sheet has reached its conclusion.
Was Cliff Potts argumentative during Occupy Chicago?
By his own admission, absolutely.
Did he make an ass of himself at LaSalle and Jackson?
He says so himself.
Was he accused of misogyny?
Yes, according to his account.
Does that accusation, without further evidence or an opportunity to examine the other side, establish that he was guilty?
No.
Does refusing to take orders from a particular woman automatically constitute misogyny?
Certainly not. The reasons for the refusal and the surrounding conduct matter.
Does enjoying women’s company, admiring their beauty, and finding adult women attractive make someone a misogynist?
Not by itself.
And does the accused still possess the capacity to say something outrageous, offend somebody, and spend the next three hours arguing about it?
Our investigators consider that possibility entirely plausible.
Fourteen years after his confrontation with Occupy Chicago, Cliff Potts is still writing, still questioning authority, still supporting the right of ordinary people to challenge powerful institutions, and still expressing opinions that some readers will undoubtedly find irritating.
He has grown older.
He has not necessarily grown quieter.
He still believes women deserve respect, independence, and equality.
He still likes their company.
He still appreciates their beauty.
And he still hopes somebody will join him for pizza.
On his 69th birthday, the man who once tried to help occupy the world from an extended-stay hotel room has a rather simpler ambition.
To enjoy whatever years remain, keep writing, keep laughing, and perhaps find someone special with whom to share a few ordinary pleasures.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CLIFF POTTS!
The world has survived another year.
Somehow.
INTERNATIONAL INCIDENT! CLIFF POTTS BECOMES A SENSATION IN CHINA! THE BOTS REFUSE TO COMMENT!
Our investigators have uncovered perhaps the most extraordinary development in this entire international scandal.
Cliff Potts, an American living in Baybay City, Leyte, Philippines, has apparently become something of an internet curiosity in China.
And the numbers are ridiculous.
According to Potts’s website statistics, traffic attributed to China outnumbers American traffic by more than three to one.
Even more astonishingly, for every Filipino visit, there are approximately ten visits attributed to China.
Ten to one!
THE MAN WRITES FROM THE PHILIPPINES, AND CHINA APPARENTLY CAN’T GET ENOUGH OF HIM!
There is, naturally, a minor complication.
Much of this traffic may be automated.
Bots.
Crawlers.
Machines.
Possibly computers that have developed an unhealthy fascination with an elderly American who writes political essays, produces Gothic Americana music, and occasionally invites women to eat pizza.
Our investigative department cannot determine how much of this traffic represents actual human readers.
Nor can it establish who operates the automated systems or what they are looking for.
But the geographic numbers are entertaining enough.
Here is a man who spent years criticizing American political and economic institutions, moved halfway around the world, and started publishing independent journalism from a Philippine city.
And now his websites appear to be attracting more attention from Chinese internet connections than from his own countrymen.
Our correspondent contacted the International Department of Things That Make Absolutely No Sense.
They declined to comment.
Potts, meanwhile, finds the whole situation hilarious.
He has apparently achieved a peculiar form of international notoriety.
Not among the political elites.
Not among the Hollywood celebrities.
Not even among the revolutionary committees that once found him so irritating.
But among the mysterious machines of the Chinese internet.
THE CHINESE BOTS HAVE DISCOVERED CLIFF POTTS!
Whether they approve of him remains unknown.
Whether they understand his jokes is equally uncertain.
And whether they have listened to Cliff Potts & the AI Rebellion is a matter of urgent international investigation.
Nevertheless, the numbers suggest that the American troublemaker’s writings are being accessed through corners of the internet he never expected to reach.
And, unlike some of his former political associates, the bots have apparently never accused him of misogyny.
They just keep coming back.
Which brings us to one final announcement.
Chinese ladies are welcome too.
Real ladies, preferably.
The bots are welcome to read WPS News and Occupy25.com.
But they’re not invited to Shakey’s.
As long as…
Well.
You know.
The International Scandal Sheet declines to elaborate. Its legal department has already suffered enough.
Editor’s disclosure: The International Scandal Sheet and its correspondent Maxine T. Scandal are fictional satirical creations. This article is a humorous autobiographical account based on Cliff Potts’s recollections. Allegations concerning other individuals and the events of 2012 have not been independently verified. Website traffic figures are based on Potts’s reported statistics and do not establish the number or nationality of human readers. Any resemblance to responsible tabloid journalism is entirely accidental.
